And Peter

“But go your way, tell his disciples and Peter that he goeth before you into Galilee: there shall ye see him, as he said unto you.” (Mark 16:7, KJV).

The crippling effect of failure gets the best of all us. Knowing fully that we are equipped to get through but because of bad choices didn’t, it robs us of our peace. How can we pray when we did it again when the last time was to be the last time?

Peter denied Christ thrice after his open declaration of willingness to die with Him. Self condemnation had taken hold of him and he felt like there was no hope. “Jesus is through with me!” he thought and so he went back to his old lifestyle. After the resurrection, Jesus send word to His disciples and specifically to Peter. It was a special invitation to repentance and a clear indication that nothing had separated Peter’s purpose from the Lord. Jesus had given him the keys of the kingdom and had no intentions of taking them back!

Do you remember your kindergarten and primary school days when you used to ‘give an tek bak’ (Give and take it back)? I did it so often. When you gave a friend something and they acted contrary and you just take it right back? Rest assured, God is NOT like that! He doesn’t give and take it back. Whatever you have been given, is yours until the end of time.

I did the most embarrassing thing once while I was in high school. I cannot remember why but I remember reporting my French teacher to her Head of Department (HOD). Why on earth would I do that? It was a valid reason but I just cannot recall. I knew that she had problems with her HOD and she was under strict supervision. The day she came to class to address the issue I had carried to her HOD she was almost in tears. She was almost certain it was another girl that sat at the front of the class who reported her. After she explained herself and left me choking in guilt I had no choice but to confess that I was the one who reported her. I felt the hate from the class in that moment and the sorrow that she poured in us was now overflowing in the atmosphere, the drop of a pin would make an impression of an earthquake because of the silence and stillness in the room. In a shock yet sorrowful tone she said; “Why Lizzette, why didn’t you just come to me and tell me how you feel?” I explained myself. My French teacher had liked me before that moment and I cannot recall that incident changing anything even though it might have affected her reputation. Sigh.

I’ve learnt two lessons from that experience: 1. Never go to the HOD or higher authority before confronting the person. And 2. Love forgives even the worst of things.

It felt very awkward after that day in French class. I wished I could drop the subject. I felt like a disappointment. Somehow my teacher looked beyond that messed up moment and saw a good student. She never treated me indifferently. However, she kept me close and was constantly encouraging me. We became good friends and would often message and exchange thoughts. She was even disappointed when I didn’t further my studies in French. She saw me as one of her model students with great potential even after a messed up moment. The power of love! Love covers sins.

I cannot but think of my other messed up moments: My inconsistencies in my relationship with God. My failures. My messy prayer life. My wavering faith. My unsurrendered will. My contrary walks. My unseasoned talks. Ah! I could go on and on. I have pushed myself away from His holiness because I knew I was unworthy after my falls. But each time I went astray, He sends a timely word my way. He never throw this clay away.

There is a Peter in all of us. It’s human to withdraw from people and situations after a disappointment. There is nothing comforting about breaking a commitment that you made to the Lord. Failures have a way of tormenting our minds and eating away our peace. Instead of standing and fighting we apt to flight; running away from God. We give up and go back to what is comfortable. There is a deception that stems from failures, we believe that we are not worthy of the calling and the investments deposited in us. How can I minister knowing that I have failed God? The lies. But I ask you, how can you not? God is omniscient! He gave Peter the keys knowing Peter would fail. Did He want Peter to fail? No. But He was making an example out of Peter. He wants us to know that there is still purpose in us after a messed up moment!

I used to wonder why God puts up with me. I thought that I would never get it right. I remember driving home from church with my church sister and crying to her about how inconsistent my prayer life was. I wanted to spend the time but each time the alarm went off I would just press it off, roll over and sleep. I was shackled by guilt and felt unworthy of the very air I breathe. I remember looking to her and saying; “why God bothers with me?” In her stern yet loving voice she responded; “He sees your heart Liz, though your actions aren’t pleasing your heart is at the right place.” It felt like heaven touched earth and I was caught in between in that moment, everything just made sense. God saw beyond my messy moments. He saw a heart that was willing to go all the way and so He did not give up on me.

Our generation is accustom to replacing things that doesn’t work or things that get broken. God is not like that! He is old school. He is patient and willing to go over and over until we get it right. Peter’s denial was one of many failures. Right after the keys were handed to him Jesus rebuked him and called him satan and an offense (See Matthew 16). But, it was Peter who got the keys, despite the failures purpose was alive and well. All Peter had to do was to get up, brush off and continue the journey. That he did and he became a vessel in the hands of God. Peter preached the first message after the outpouring of the Holy Ghost (Acts 2), he unlocked the doors of salvation for the Samaritans (Acts 8) and it was Peter who led Cornelius and his household, the first Gentiles, to Christ (Acts 10). This messed up man did exploits. It was all because Jesus saw beyond the moment of failure. And Peter used the keys!

“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.“ (Romans 8:35-39, KJV).

Who or what shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall failures, inconsistencies, disappointments or falls separate us? Nay! In all these we are MORE than conquerors. The beloved disciple John said; “…..if any man sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous:” (1 John 2:1, KJV). And, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9, KJV). Provisions are made for failures, we just need to repent and allow God to put the fragments of our brokenness together. Peter, use the keys! Don’t allow your failures to hinder you from fulfilling the call God has on your life. “For a just man falleth seven times, and riseth up again…” (Proverbs 24:16, KJV). Brush off and continue the race, there is still more for you to accomplish!